To lose the ones you love
by Mizura
Summary: Somebody is trying to ruin Sakura's life! It's someone she knows...but, who can it be?


To lose the ones you love...**

To lose the ones you love...

**

Midnight... 

The full moon shines brightly, illuminating the sky with a brilliant silver color.  A cat scurries away from a wall with a screech.  There are no stars out... 

I smile, looking out of the window.  Outside, it was beautiful.  No, more like unearthly.  Maybe that was why it was beautiful.  I have no worries about the moon or sun or anything anymore.  I am a normal girl.  A normal teen aged girl, leading a perfectly normal life.  Maybe a little bit too normal, considering what I have done only eight or nine years ago... 

When I was ten, I was a card captor.  I battled clow cards and sealed them up as they should be...the card's guardian, Cerberus, aka. Kero-chan disappeared shortly after all that happened to me...I still have the power of dream seeking, or having dreams that sometimes come true, but all of my other powers have left me.  The only thing I have to remind me of what I had done is the key I used to seal those cards...and the boy who helped me "seal" them... 

I wonder if I will ever forget...no, I don't _want_ to forget anything that happened to me.  All of my memories are going to stay tucked in the back of my mind...until I die... 

I open the window and stick my head out, glancing around at the space below me.  Darkness...a small tree swaying with the wind...but nothing else.  I sigh, without purpose. 

::I'd better get to sleep.::  I check the clock behind me and gasp.  It is already twelve-thirty... 

I didn't know I was thinking about what happened to me for a half an hour!  I crawl back into bed and lay my head on my pillow.  ::Sweet dreams.::

*  *  *

I peer into the dark room.  Silence...the coast is clear.  I sneak past an open door and hear the snoring of one who is familiar.  A relative...  I tiptoe into the kitchen, shuffling through the drawers.  ::No, not that...or that...or _that_...argh, where _is_ it?!:: My hands pick up a familiar object.  ::Finally!:: 

I see the familiar silver color of the object as I sharpen what I hold in my hand.  ::Well, well...who shall be next?::

*  *  *

I yawn, opening my eyes.  "What...time is...it?" 

"You're up!"  Tomoyo is in my room, smiling and holding her video recorder tightly in her hands.  "I was waiting forever!" 

"HOEH!  Tomoyo-chan!"  I sweep my auburn hair from my face with a start, and then smile sheepishly at her.  "What are _you_ doing here?" 

"I came to see you~!"  she answers.  "Um...that's about it." 

I fall over, feeling a sweatdrop growing on my head.  "O...oh..." 

She leans over and grasps my hands.  "How are things going between you and Li-kun?"  she demands to know. 

I feel my face grow warm.  "U...uh...fine." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Positive~!" 

She smiles, letting go.  "Would you like to go to the market today with me?" 

I'm glad she changed the subject...  "Um, sure!  I have nowhere else to go..." 

"Good!"  her eyes twinkle with what I think is happiness.  "Let's g--" 

"Hold on!"  I jump out of bed,  "I think the phone is ringing!"  I grab the phone, crossing my fingers and hoping the person didn't hang up yet.  "Hello!?  This is the Kinomoto residence, Sakura speaking!" 

"Kinomoto-san."  the voice I hear is low...sort of menacing. 

"Y...yes?" 

"Do you know a girl named Rika Sasaki?" 

"Y...yes!  She's one of my best friends!" 

"I'm sorry, then." 

"Hoeh?" 

"Rika Sasaki has just passed away."

------------------------------------

::Oh no, oh no, oh no...::  I bite my lip on instinct, while Tomoyo tries to comfort me... 

::Please no, please...::  I shake my head and Tomoyo blinks with a confused expression. 

"O...oh!  What were you saying?"  I try out a smile, and I guess I was able to fool her, because she looks relieved... 

"I was saying--"  she begins again, but I don't hear a thing she says...she's blocked out from my thoughts...my loud thoughts... 

::_Why_?! Why _her_?!  What did she do?  Why didn't I know that it was going to happen?  Have I lost my dream seeing power?:: 

::Please, no...this is just a dream...:: 

::No, please, this is just my imagination!  If it's a dream, then it might come true...::   
    
I feel a little woozy... 

"Sakura!"  I hear a familiar voice and turn. 

"Li-kun..." 

"Li-kun!"  Tomoyo cries out excitedly.  "What do you think I should label this tape?  How about "A Mysterious Death"?  Or something more dramatic?" 

I sigh to myself.  Does she only think about recording things? 

"Sakura?"  I look up to see two concerned amber eyes and immediately my face grows warm. 

"..."  I take a step forward and put my head on his chest, wishing that this was not happening to me. 

"Sakura?"  he repeats.  "Are you okay?" 

"What happened to her?"  my voice comes out as a small whisper. 

"Huh?  What?" 

"What...happened to her?"  I raise my eyes once more.  "What _happened_ to her!?" 

"She was stabbed repeatedly with a sharp object.  Probably a knife."  the doctor walks in and informs me. 

I feel tears coming out of my eyes and I sniffle.  "But by who?" 

"We don't know yet." 

That does it.  Something clicks inside of me and the tears rush forward...

*  *  *

::Poor Sakura...poor, poor, Sakura...::  I sigh, stroking the girl's hair.  ::This is the second time in a year that her one of her friends have passed away...:: 

"Li-kun, _why_?"  a muffled whisper finds its way to my ears. 

"I...don't know."  I feel horrible for not being able to answer her straightforwardly... 

"I was trying to forget Naoko-chan's death...and now...now..." 

"Sssshhh." 

Tomoyo sits down, putting her camera away for the first time in a while.  I usually see her take it out, instead of replace it.  "Sakura-chan..."  she blinks away a few of her own tears and then stands back up, putting her hand on Sakura's shoulder comfortingly.  "It'll be okay..." 

"No it won't!"  Sakura pulls away from me and turns on Tomoyo.  "You knew Naoko-chan and Rika-chan, too!  They were two of _your_ best friends!  Why don't you _care_ about what happens to them!?" 

Tomoyo's gray eyes widen and her hand flies to her mouth.  I grab a hold of Sakura before she could do any acts of violence...although I don't think she would.  She's not that kind of person... 

"What do you mean that _I don't care_?!"  this is the first time I've ever seen Tomoyo raise her voice.  It doesn't match her much...she's not very intimidating. 

"I mean exactly what I said!  You didn't even _cry_ for Naoko-chan!  And now you're going to try and laugh off Rika-chan's death!?" 

"Sakura!"  my voice cries out on its own. 

"_What_!?"  I see her emerald eyes flash angrily.  "You don't know how this feels!  You don't know what it feels like to have one of your best friends die!  I thought it was bad enough at that!  But then my other friend is killed!  Killed!  Before I've gotten over the other death..." 

"Sakura..." 

"_Leave me alone!_  All of you!"  she stomps her foot with an angry pout on her face.  "Don't try to comfort me when you don't even know how I feel!" 

"Shut up." 

"NO!"  she screams at me, her pretty face now showing every sign of anger and frustration. 

"Shut up!"  I step to her, grabbing her shoulders and glaring into her eyes.  "Just shut up, okay?  Do you think that you know everyone else's feelings?" 

"No!  Why do you think I haven't tried to comfort anyone else!?" 

"Sakura!"  anger begins to rise up from me, also.  "_Think_ about what you're saying!  You're as guilty as us!  Don't you understand!?" 

"...Li-kun..."  she takes a deep breath, then lets it out, along with all her traces of anger.  "..I'm sorry...Tomoyo-chan, Li-kun..." 

"It's okay."  Tomoyo turns.  "I have to go home...it's getting late." 

"Bye." 

"Good-bye."  she nods towards me and I nod back.  Then she is gone.

*  *  *

I grit my teeth.  "This is just not working."  I push back my long hair and think. 

::Who else is close to Kinomoto Sakura?  Think, think, think...ah-ha!::  I smile.  ::Her family.  Of course!  I've forgotten the most obvious!::  my smile becomes a evil grin as I look at myself in the mirror.  ::This week shall be her worst nightmare.::

*  *  *

"Sakura-san?"  I open the door and peek outside.  "Hmmm.  It wasn't her, then."  I glance at the clock.  "Of course, Sakura-san should be sleeping right now."  I smile to myself.  "I guess I should make her lunch right now because I'm leaving to work early."  I hum a familiar tune to myself and begin to cut cucumbers to put into my daughter's lunch... 

_Knock, knock, knock._

"Who could it be?"  I put the knife down on the cutting board and walk over to the door.  "Yes?" 

"Hello, Fujitaka-san." 

"Oh, hello, you're a little late, aren't you?  To--"  pain shoots through my leg and I wince.  "Ouch.  I think I cut myself..." 

"Are you okay?" 

"Yes, I'm fine."  I escort our visitor into the living room and sit down.  ::My leg is bleeding...why...?  I don't remember cutting it...:: 

"Would you like some help, Fujitaka-san?" 

"Well, no, that's okay, but thanks--"  the visitor's stands up and goes behind me, massaging my shoulders. 

"I know this isn't much, but I don't know if I could help you with your wound." 

"Well, thank you--"  the visitor's hands wrap slowly around my neck and on instinct, I try to pull away.  The hands are surprisingly strong, and I am unable to move from my position because of the pain of my wound. 

There must be poison in my leg...I have to clean it... 

The hands squeeze tightly and I feel my eyes widen.  I lift my own hands up to stop the visitor's... 

::...can't breathe...::  blackness appears before my eyes.  ::..someone help...I can't go now...not...now...::

*  *  *

"I'm sorry."  my hands strangle the life out of Sakura's father...  I can't help but grin with glee...it was fun seeing others suffer.  And suffer hard... 

I giggle to myself, nervous.  I'd better leave before someone wakes up...

*  *  *

My eyes open slowly.  "Mmmm..."  I sit up.  "Where--" 

"It's still late...get back to sleep..."  a small voice calls out from under the bed covers and I pull them off. 

"Oh!" 

"Leave me alone...I'm tired..." 

"Sorry."  I drop the covers back. 

"Hey!"  Syaoran pokes his head out from under the blanket.  "You don't need to _kill_ me with the cover, you know."  he complains, and then lays back down. 

"Sorry." 

"...hey, are you feeling any better?" 

"No." 

He didn't answer.  I guess he fell asleep.  I stand and stretch out.  "I'll be back..."  I whisper just in case he _was_ awake. 

"...okay..." 

::Okay, he's not asleep.::  I sigh, walking downstairs.  ::Maybe I'll watch some TV.::  I walk into the living room and sit down, picking up the remote control. 

Then I notice something. 

"Dad?"  I inch over to the unmoving figure.  "Dad?" 

::Why was he sleeping in _here_?::  I flick on the light, checking to see if he is okay or not.  I look down, and nausea sweeps over me.  "Daddy...?  Dad?  Are you sleeping?  Wake up!  Wake up!?"  I slip suddenly on liquid...warm, sticky, red liquid... 

"OH MY GOD!!!!!!"

------------------------------------

The third murder in a row.  Three people I know...three people I cared for very much...are gone... 

::Am I going to be next?::  I gasp at the thought, remembering how my father had looked...his leg bloody, his neck broken... 

I cough, shaking my head.  "No!  NO!  I won't end up like that!" 

"Like what?"  Syaoran turns his head to face me. 

"N...nothing..." 

His hand moves up to touch my face.  "You're pale...you need some rest..." 

"But--" 

"You won't be the next to die, if you're worrying." 

"...how do you know...?" 

"I won't let anything happen to you."  those amber eyes look so honest... 

I find myself falling into his arms.  "I'm...sorry..." 

"It's okay."  he helps me up.  "...don't forget, I'll protect you."  he whispers into my ear and I blush slightly.  "Okay?  Trust me."   
"I do."

*  *  *

"Yuki!!"  I rush down the stairs, grabbing a bag and pushing the door open.  "Yuki?" 

"Hello, To~ya."  Yuki smiles at me, grimly.  "You've heard about what happened to your father?" 

"Something happened to him?!" 

"He's dead, To~ya.  He was killed yesterday night." 

"_What_!?"

------------------------------------

::Why would someone want to kill my father?::  the question lingers in my head.  ::There's no reason...that I can think of...:: 

::Did he have any enemies?  No.::  I grit my teeth.  ::If that guy does _anything_ to Sakura, I will have his head!:: 

_Knock, knock, knock._

"Coming!"  I fling open the door.  "Yuki?"  I ask with hope. 

"I'm sorry."  Tomoyo stands at the door, gray eyes full of sadness. 

"Sakura's not here, you know where she lives." 

"I know.  I came to talk to you." 

"Me!?"

------------------------------------

"What do you _mean_ that you know who the murderer is?!"  I slam my hand on the table and my coffee spills out a little. 

"I have an idea of who.  I will tell you when I get back.  I will bring evidence." 

"Okay."  I narrow my eyes.  "_Be careful_." 

"Do not worry, I will."  Tomoyo exits hurriedly, looking around.

*  *  *

::So, my next target shall be Kinomoto...Touya.::  I smile, tying my hair up.  ::I wouldn't want blood to get on my hair...::

*  *  *

_Knock, knock, kno--_

"Tomoyo!  You're quick!  Did you bring it--"  I open the door and then gape at the sight before me. 

I hear three gunshots and feel an excruciating pain in my stomach, leg, and arm... 

Then everything becomes red...

*  *  *

I knock on the door of my friend's house, waiting for an answer.  "To~ya!  Would you open the door?  I know you're home!"  I try the door and find it unlocked.  "Hmmm.  That's weird."  I step in the room and then trip over something.  I look down and all I see is red.  Red all over the floor...red on the walls... 

I adjust my glasses, but the scenery doesn't change.  "T...To~ya...no..."

*  *  *

::Another person in the way?!::  I yell in my head.  ::Argh, so many people are trying to ruin my plans!:: 

I walk slowly into the room.  Yukito does not seem to notice. 

Then, my fingers closed upon the gun still hidden in my jacket.  I point, then shoot. 

The boy falls forward with a gasp of pain, but nothing more.  I look around, making sure that no one else was left...then I throw the gun down next to the dead bodies with vengeance. 

::I've killed five people.::  my eyes widen as I begin my walk home.  ::Yanagisawa Naoko, Sasaki Rika, Kinomoto Fujitaka, Kinomoto Touya, Tsukishiro Yukito...everyone near Sakura...almost.::  a bitter smile plays on my lips.  ::There's still _Daidouji Tomoyo_...Li Syaoran...and Sakura herself.:: 

::I'll teach her how it feels to lose _everyone_...::

*  *  *

About a month after the deaths...   
    
"Kinomoto Sakura?"  a passing mailman handed me a letter.  "This is for you." 

"Well, thank you."  I ripped the letter open.  After I read it, I proceeded to call Syaoran. 

"This is Syaoran."  a bored voice answered the phone.  "What do you want and who are you?" 

"Li-kun!" 

"Oh, Sakura.  What's up?" 

"You have to see this letter I just got..." 

"Okay, then...are you coming here or--" 

"Come here, _please_!" 

"Okay..." 

We say our good-byes and I wait impatiently for him. 

When he gets here, I show him the letter.  He reads out loud: 

"Kinomoto Sakura:   
If you would like to know who killed your friends and family, you must come to the shelter on Old Country Road (where ever in the world is that?!) tonight at nine with Li Syaoran... (me? why me?)   
Signed, T." 

"T."  I sigh.  "Who could that be?" 

"We'll find out tonight." 

------------------------------------

I wonder who it could be.  ::Who is T?  I don't know anyone with a T as an initial...:: 

I sigh.  Maybe I really shouldn't go tonight...at least I don't have to go alone... 

It'll be better to have someone with me... 

Especially Li-kun... 

I feel my face grow warm, and I shake my head.  Not now... 

_Now_, I have to think about whether to go or not... 

I don't want to go... 

But I have to, in order to know who it is... 

_Tick, tock..._

The clock's unusually loud... 

_Tick, tock...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring...ring..._

Time seems to have slowed down... 

_RING._

Nine o' clock.  I push open the door of the shelter. 

"Perfect timing."  Syaoran smiles encouragingly, moving over and holding the door open for me.  "It's a small place."  he warns. 

"Thanks." 

What he said was right.  The place was considerably small.  He sits me down on his lap and keeps his arm around me. 

"I wonder who'll be coming..." 

"If they come."  I point out. 

"Yeah." 

I notice something shiny in his hand, and I question it. 

"It's a knife."  he answers matter-of-factly. 

"Why do you have it?"  I think that fear envelopes me and I pull away.  "Li-kun, put it away..._please_..." 

"Why?  I have it just in case someone pulls a dirty trick on us." 

"Why would they--" 

"Someone's here." 

"Hoeh?"  I look around, but do not see anyone.  I do not think that I sense anyone's presence, either. 

"Come out." 

Silence. 

"Come out!"  Syaoran says forcefully. 

"I want to go home..." 

"Sssshhh!" 

"But I want to go home..."  I whisper, looking away. 

He seizes that chance to take his sword and stab...right into my flesh... 

My brain screams at me that there's something unwanted inside of me...I cry out in pain and he pulls it out. 

"Sakura?"  he cried out in mock alarm.  "Sakura!  What happened?" 

My eyes fill up with tears as I begin to realize.  He had betrayed me...he was the one who had killed everyone...my friends...my family... 

"N...naze?"  I try to pull away, but he won't let me. 

His eyes widen and he holds me against him, whispering something... 

"No...oh please, no...not her...anyone but her..." 

"Li-kun?"  the pain fades just slightly, and is replaced with a sudden urge to give up...to sleep...and never wake again... 

::NO!  I need to know why!:: 

"Li-kun!  What did I do wrong?" 

"What are you talking about?"  I see him rip a piece of cloth off of his jacket, wrapping it around my wound and pressing hard. 

"Why do you want me dead...?"  it takes my full strength to keep from crying in pain. 

"What are you _talking _about?!  I don't want you dead!" 

"Then why...did you...do this to me...?"  my eyesight begins to fail me... 

"Sakura!" 

My eyes close, and I listen to what he says... 

"Sakura!"  his voice is full of panic...  "Do you think that _I_ was the one who...who hurt you?!  I didn't do a thing, I didn't notice anyone around...I...still don't!  I didn't do anything--" 

"Baka..."  my voice is very faint...I don't think he hears me... 

"Believe me!  Didn't you trust me before?!  Do you think I would do such a thing?  Sakura!  Answer me!" 

"I'm sorry...I can't...not anymore..."  it is getting harder to breathe by the minute.  "Li-kun...I trusted you...I _did_...but now...I..." 

"Sakura!" 

"I...loved you..."  I forced my eyes to open.  "And I'm sorry I did...good-bye, Li-ku--"  I can't get myself to say anything further... 

I needed sleep...sleep...sleep would remove my worries...

*  *  *

"SAKURA!"  I slump down, my head lowered.  ::Why did she think it was me...?  I didn't do a thing...I...:: 

::How _did_ he stab her?!?!:: 

"Sakura..."  I hold her to me, brushing her hair from her face. 

There was blood on her face.  Her beautiful face... I wipe it off, my eyes watering. 

"KUSO!"  I lie her down and stand up.  "Come _out_!" 

There is a rustle behind me and I turn, my eyes narrowed. 

"Li-kun."  a voice says. 

I jump, not believing who it is.   
    
Tomoyo. 

"W...why the hell did you--" 

"Li-kun."  Tomoyo repeats, a smirk plastered on her face.  "I knew that you wouldn't suspect me." 

"T..."  I bite my lip.  "Of course!" 

"You're slow."  the deadly sword is placed in her hand.  "And you'll be the next one to go." 

I glare at her.  "Why...?!" 

"Well, at least you'll be with your beloved."  she ignores my question completely. 

I scramble to pick up the knife I had dropped a while back.  "I won't stand being killed by you." 

"Oh really."  she seems bored... 

And that's when everything crashed in my mind.  Reality was gone... 

A mixture of emotions swam around my head...anger...sadness...hurt...betrayl...frustration...hate... 

"I won't let you kill me."  I state. 

I have an idea, after all...and pride... 

"Let's see about that."  Tomoyo leaps, sword ready. 

"Sorry to ruin your fun."  I grab hold of my knife...and plunge it straight into my heart.  Welcomed pain's narrow fingers wrap around me...I collapse, my legs giving way...

*  *  *

"KYAAAHHH~!!!"  I leap out of bed, screaming as if Hell had crossed over and was now in my room. 

"Tomoyo!"  my mother rushes into my room.  "Are you alright?" 

"F...fine, mother..."  I smile.  "I just had a nightmare...that's all." 

"Okay, don't scare me like that anymore." 

"I'm sorry." 

She leaves my room. 

"Thank goodness that was all a dream."  I sigh to myself.  "It's a good thing that I'm not a dream seeker..."  I glance into the mirror.  "And now I'm my right age. 11." 

Then I have an idea. 

"Oh!  That may mean that Li-kun and Sakura-chan will be getting together when they get older!"  I smile to the reflection in the mirror, which smiles back. 

I grab my video recorder and hurry off, forgetting about everything else that had occured in my nightmare. 

::Thank goodness.:: 


End file.
